Save me from myself

20131014_094129I previously wrote a glowing review of Sky Nelson-Isaac’s book, Living in the Flow and regularly receive emails from him about his courses and his music. Although I loved his book, I’m afraid his new song “Stand For Me” is an excellent example of a mindset that can destroy a country or any organization that is made up of individual people. This is so important, especially in the face of recent crises that I’ve pasted my review of his song here. I also inserted a recording and lyrics of another song, written and performed by my son Bobby, called “Save Me From Myself” to give you what I think we need from our artists.



Hello Sky,

I watched your video, listened closely and read the lyrics to your song. You have a beautiful voice and play well. I love your spirit, Sky and I love your book Living in the Flow. In your email you said, “The more honest we can be with each other, the more we can forgive each other for our mistakes, the more we will build a just and resilient community.” So I will be honest with you. You also said, “I see examples of this interdependence around us.” The problem I see with the song is that you confuse dependence or co-dependence with interdependence. You can only get interdependence from a group of mature independent people. I recommend that you read Steven Covey’s book The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People to understand this maturity continuum.

If the protagonist in the song was the voice of the collective consciousness saying that it needs people to stand for the whole world or even a small organization, like the the one against domestic violence that you are trying to help, I would say it was great. Even our great country cannot stand without its people because “the less it needs the more it disappears” as you said. But as it is, I hear the protagonist in the song as an individual human who can not or will not take a stand from himself. If the first verse had explained that the singer was abused to such an extent that he or she no longer had any hope of helping herself, then I would have felt compassion.  But instead, I was very concerned that the song will be sung by people who think that they are not capable of taking care of themself and beg for the generosity of others who, by the way did not just find, in your words, “a garden they can go to to shutter out the pain”. We all have to suffer the pain that comes from taking care of ourself. Everyone starts out entirely dependent, and the only  “garden” is the state that you are in when you can make your own declaration of independence. The “tyrant” that the protagonist faces is his own shadow and he is the only one who can defeat that shadow. To say, “I depend on you. There’s nowhere I can go, I’m counting on you” is the voice of a coward.

What about living in the flow? What’s wrong with flowing on the river of life – the river of other people’s courage and sacrifices?

If you are not actually the “water” in the river, then maybe you are something floating on the surface. Sure, you can float for a while, but eventually you will get hung up on some obstruction. Perhaps you are a fish in the river. If so, you will eventually be eaten by a bigger fish. Living in the flow is a wonderful and helpful concept for the dependent phase of life, but if nobody wants to become the water, the river will dry up. By living in the flow you come to realize that it is the only way to live, but you don’t really “get it” until you mature spiritually, when you become the flow.

Now is the time that our country needs heros. The protagonist in your song needs to understand that everyone has a hero within himself. Haven’t you ever noticed that the conscience  that guides you is much stronger and braver than you are? That conscience speaks to you from your very own “garden”. At the point in the song when you say, “I believe in you, I’ve seen your courage shine when it needs to,” in my opinion that should be the protagonist pleading to his own hero self. And that IS an emergency because nobody can stand FOR you. I will stand BY you but I can not stand for you. I, Theodore, am just a symbol and I stand FOR the collective whole (group, city, state, country or planet), united with those who are willing to sacrifice their own lives for the same whole. That is why I will always stand for the pledge of allegiance.

My son, Bobby St. John who I told to about, who owns St.John Music Lessons in San Antonio, TX wrote a song “Save me from myself”, which is about what he calls “the image in the mirror”, “the shadow you can’t shake that keeps shifting” and then a “lifesize ink blot” that follows you around. He understands that we are all holomorphic projections – seemingly separate individuals but actually just individual parts of that conscience that calls us all to be heros. I’m posting it, along with this review on my website.


Here it is:

Save Me From Myself, by Bobby St. John


Verse 1:

When the image in the mirror gets so far from the truth and your footsteps lie contrary to you. Like a shadow you can’t shake that keeps shifting and making you make mistakes then the war is here it’s at your front door. Sometimes the only way to lay waste to a bad thing besides “the bang bang” is a train of thought a tough road to walk. When you’re caught with that lifesize inkblot following you around, fight the urge to throw your arms to the ground. Come on open your mouth brother make a sound and say


Save me from myself. I’m alone and I don’t want to find that a hero has been standing by. Save me from myself cause when there’s nowhere left to run and the man in the mirror’s got a gun, you’ve got the power to bring about the Sun.

Verse 2:

So fight the good fight. You could if you would step on through the night, if you stood up and bled just a little instead of fled, well then you should see the shadow start to fade from sight. And if you’re curious and I know it’s not easy but I wouldn’t leave you behind or show you a lie if you’re bleeding then that means I’m also cut.


So save me from myself well I’m alone and I don’t wanna find that a hero has been standing by. Save me from myself cause when there is nowhere left to run and the man in the mirror’s got a gun you’ve got the power to bring about the Sun.


And when there’s nobody else to… face except yourself, just come on down off your shelf now ’cause there’s no way without a fight we’re going down.


Save me from myself. I’m alone and I don’t want to find that a hero has been standing by. Save me from myself cause when there’s nowhere left to run and the man in the mirror’s got a gun, you’ve got the power to bring about the Sun.


By the way, if you wonder why I chose to include the photo at the top of this page… I don’t recall where was taken, but we were on a trip from San Diego to Oregon. That’s me staring at the carving.  The carving is also me, peeking around from the backside to see if the real me can tell that I am pretending to be a sculpture.


A piece of my heart goes to Greta Thunberg

If you haven’t seen or heard about Greta Thunberg, I ask that you start with her talk at TEDx and then watch her “scathing speech” at the United Nations Climate Action Summit. I have been much like her in that I couldn’t believe that there was a climate crisis because if it were true, then surely all of the really “good” and smart people in the world would make sure that we all knew about it and that we were all doing something significant about it, and not just giving it lip service.

Now I am an elder, so it is much easier for me to look calmly at it and to say with confidence that it is all part of the cycle of life, the holomorphic process, which absolutely hinges on crises like this in order to swing people into action. And that, I think is why most of the other elders don’t seem to be giving it the appropriate level of response. But she, and all of you young “wizards” out there (I explain “wizards” in my response below), are in the position to see the urgency to take action as “movers and shakers” (or “Beaters and Chasers”) because if you don’t, this crisis will hit you very hard in your lifetime. It is one that you can see coming and the last thing you want to do is to let it happen and then look back to realize that you, as a seemingly insignificant adolescent, could have done SOMETHING to help prevent it.

Holomorphosis: The Magic Word

I am an old wizard and my advice to you is to start by looking at yourself in the mirror and saying the word (and having an understanding of) holomorphosis. Consider it a magic word if you like, but understand that it is the miraculous process that we are all part of. The physical world as we see it with our physical eyes is only the holographic projection. When you look at yourself in the mind’s mirror with your mind’s eye, you either see the masks that you have created (like most adults do today) or you see your own Spirit of Truth, which you continuously create when you live in truth and allow it to transform itself into wisdom. That part of you is what communicates with Mother Earth when you are in harmony with the holomorphic process.

When you say “the magic words” (whatever it is that you say to make change in the world) with heart (sincerity), you transform dark energy into vibrations that manifest as quantum bits of energy that form physical reality and make things happen. Millions of us have been doing it (some call it prayer) but there is a competition going on. The tragic irony is that people with selfish agendas can also transform energy even though it is not in harmony with the life process. So we need more players, i.e. people who know how to “play the game” of life on the side of truth. You are at the “train platform” and once you pass through the gate and board the train to “Hogwarts”, you will learn what to do to discover your role .

The solution to the climate crisis is much simpler than you might think. Please read my post on Greta’s Facebook page below:

Thank you Greta. As I learn more about you, and about the physics of consciousness, I gain more insight into the concept of “old soul”. I realize that we who care about truth and accept the challenge – to take action so that we can “look ourselves in the mirror” as you said – are the ones who accept the “Spirit of Truth”, thereby gaining the $wisdom$ (the only thing of real value) and wake up in a new body. That is the underlying message of the Harry Potter myths; we eventually realize (sometimes through Asperger, meditation or “Hogwarts”) that we are wizards (wise-ards) – the embodiments of Truth. Too many people play the role of “Muggles” who accept the **crap** that they call “real life” and then try to give you **crap** about following your heart. Others play the role of “Voldemort” or “Quirrell”. They either fight against you or don’t even accept the challenge (metaphorically the game of “Quidditch” i.e. evolution of consciousness via physical journey in the womb of Mother Earth). We who acknowledge only truth realize that we have the power to,  and will, win the competition and thus save the world. As an elder physicist of Danish descent, I have been a “Seeker” going after the “Golden Snitch” for the last 30 years and I’m getting close to catching it (see my site at You seem to be either a “Chaser” or a “Beater” batting down the “Bludger”. And you probably know better than I (since I have been flying somewhat isolated in America) that there are a lot more wizards out there working with us. I know it can be exhausting, so I ask you to take a little piece of my heart. And I am asking everyone else to support us in this competition. To them I say, please realize that you too have the power to learn and face the truth in order to look yourself in the mirror. But as Professor Dumbledore warned, “The truth is a beautiful and terrible thing, and should therefore be treated with great caution.” If you choose to join us and find the “Sorcerer’s stone” you can only *find* it and never *use* it for your own agenda. The good news is, and here’s a secret… if you find it, you understand that there’s no need to use it as an “Elixir of Life” because you realize that life is already eternal. And that will bring you into the “Chamber of Secrets”. Make sure you are ready!

The real irony in life, the twist and the reason the hero always wins, is that the tragic irony I mentioned above (that people with selfish agendas can also transform energy, albeit out of harmony) produces physical structures that actually support the life process. So truth wins either way. It just takes a little longer, and requires more versions and sequels of the “Neverending Story” to reach the threshold, when the “upward” transformation process becomes “supercritical” (a nuclear power term that means exponentially increasing). Until then, we just have to stick with it and enjoy the game of life.


Three cheers for a new book, Living in Flow, by physicist Sky Nelson-Isaacs

Flow is an experience that we all have at many times in our lives. When I was a trumpeter in my high school marching, concert and jazz bands (1974-78), we used to call it, “being in the groove” …  yeah baby… that’s what “groovy” meant. But it’s more than just a cool feeling; it is a real and powerful experience that illustrates how physics can be used to understand a very important aspect to the human experience.

That is exactly what Sky Nelson-Isaacs has done in his new book

Living in Flow: The Science of Synchronicity and How Your Choices Shape Your World

North Atlantic Books (2019). Kindle Edition. See

Sky has an MS in physics and has discovered a brilliant way of addressing the underlying essence of the reality that matters. He starts and ends with human experience, bringing physics back to Earth, the realm of real life, rather than accepting the fantasy world of Big Bang Cosmology. (I’m just slamming the 3D version of creation-in-an-instant, not the 4D version that refers to creation as a continuous process.) Living in Flow is beautifully written, and easy to understand – a literary illustration of flow itself. And I love the fact that  his name is Sky, since his explanation is so down-to-Earth rather than being out of reach, up in outer space.

Not only does he provide what I consider to be the best answers to the hard questions, and show how they apply to our lives, but more importantly, he corrected some of the question fallacies that have been the source of a tremendous amount of wasted time and money. In my opinion, besides being the title of Lee Smolin’s book, the trouble with physics is that most physicists tend to use physics to understand reality rather than using reality and experience to understand physics. And they ask questions that already assume an answer: like, “How did the universe get started?” assumes that it actually started at a specific time. Yet, as Sky points out and explains, light is timeless; so the whole concept of a big bang is tragically flawed. (Anybody looking to buy a large but slightly used hadron collider?)

I had learned the name “flow” and the Csikszentmihalyi flow diagram (the colorful diagram below on the left) back around 2000 from a neurosurgeon, who was on my Ph.D. research committee at the University of Florida Brain Institute.

Flow Remodeled

The diagram on the right is the same concept, but I remodeled it to show how it looks if you reduce apathy to a quantum point, suggesting that anyone can get into the flow zone regardless of how little skill you have. It’s not only driven by arousal and control, but until you get to that level of skill, it requires courage and dedication to pass through Worry and Anxiety on the maturity continuum. I had already planned on using this form of the flow diagram in a book that I am writing to illustrate how the holomorphic process flows right out of the interactions of quantum particles (via motion) and into the world of experience (motion that has been tagged by “e” for experience i.e. “e-motion”). Sky actually discusses this level of the process (experience, emotion, feeling, and thought) as follows:

“In the phenomenological model I’m using, everything starts with having experiences in the world. Emotions are then an automatic physiological response that our bodies have to our experiences—what Damasio calls the proto-self. Stomach butterflies when we are afraid or goose pimples when we are in awe are bodily reactions to emotions that we don’t have any conscious control over. Feelings, on the other hand, are how we perceive the emotions. Having feelings gives rise to what Damasio calls core consciousness. Feelings are more complex than emotions because they depend on how we perceive our circumstances. A seasoned performer may respond with feelings of joy and excitement to the emotion of butterflies in the stomach, whereas someone with stage fright may try to run away as far as possible. By adding our own mental interpretation to our emotions, the five basic emotions of fear, anger, joy, sadness, and disgust become a broad field of possible feelings or interpretations. Finally, our thoughts are those connections we make “in our head” while trying to make sense out of our experiences and our emotions. Taken together, these considerations suggest that our life consists of experiences, to which we have emotional reactions, which we interpret as feelings and which lead to cognitive thoughts about life.”

Nelson-Isaacs, Sky. Living in Flow (p. 50). North Atlantic Books. Kindle Edition.

After reading Sky’s book I watched the YouTube video with Csikszentmihalyi explaining his flow diagram, and I wrote the following comments:

The concept of flow has a much more profound importance than just the physiological (opioid and dopamine) experience. I learned about the flow diagram from a neurosurgeon (one of my medical physics Ph. D. committee) back in 2001 and immediately recognized its validity and importance in my life as a musician, physicist, teacher and parent.

The profound implications of flow are in the way flow makes sense of quantum and relativistic physics and the idea of “parallel universes”, which author Jim Baggott called fantasy physics (in his book “Farewell to Reality”). This is explained beautifully by physicist Sky Nelson-Isaacs in his new book, “Living in Flow: The science of synchronicity and how your choices shape your world”. It is a must read for anyone who has experienced or just “gets it” – the idea of flow – and wants to understand how physics supports it. As a retired medical physicist, I’ve been working on a model for understanding mind/body medical physics, (because I think it’s better than the poison/cut/burn approach to curing cancer) and I find the concept of flow as well as Isaacs’ explanation to be the best and most useful to help the human condition. And you don’t have to know any complicated physics to understand it.

Isaacs explains it in terms of “meaningful history selection”, which to me is similar to the notion that life makes sense in reverse but you have to live it in forward. It takes time to realize that time is an allusion, i.e. alluded to by your perspective (my words) and that light is timeless (Isaac’s words). It is the first time I’ve seen the “parallel universe” idea used in a meaningful and sensible way and it relates directly to flow. Flow makes it seem like the universe responds to your path to fulfillment by sort of deselecting all of your “potential futures” that fail to line up with your authentic desires (symbolically portrayed as “apples” at the tip of branches).

Information stored in DNA

How Much Information is Stored in the Human Genome? 

This is an excellent topic. There is enough information stored in the DNA to provide the program necessary for life. But where does the information come from? The question should not be “who?” That assumes a forgone conclusion. Creation is a process, driven by the apparent separation of formless energy (a unity) via relative motion. You may think that you are sitting motionless, but in fact, you are in motion relative to every other particle in the universe. The coexistence of these mutually exclusive states (binary bits) provides the apparent separation of unity and a restoring centripetal force that gives quantum particles their angular momentum. This is the basis for a metamorphic process. The self-sustaining process creates the vibrational energy that collapses into quantum states – bits of information, which creates constructive and destructive interference, which amplifies a holomorphic process (separation, projection, reflection, reunification; see It results in self-organizing subatomic particles that make up the atoms that make up the base pairs that make up the DNA molecules… All of the information around us (i.e. Truth… that which actually happened) continuously collapses into every DNA center, and the same process results in cell-division and the destruction of cells that fail to follow the process, allowing the organism to adapt to a changing environment.

The question, “who started the process?” is also a question fallacy because the process is a circle with no beginning or end. The act of drawing a circle may require a beginning, but the circle itself just is. Time is a human concept that is nothing more than a different way of quantifying motion. So there is no beginning, no creation event. Am I saying there is no God? No. “God” is the name of the process, by which Truth transforms into consciousness, which has no beginning of end… it just is. If it spoke for itself, it would say “I am… I just am. I am that intelligible sphere whose center is everywhere and circumference nowhere.” So God is the energy, the process and the resulting consciousness. Sounds like a holy trinity to me.


A Global Collaboration

Originally posted August 31, 2018
Updated September 22, 2018

In the spirit of polymath projects, this project presents a problem: how to understand the holographic nature of reality, along with a proposed approach to solving the problem, which is explained in “The Holomorphic Process, Understanding the holographic nature of reality as a metamorphic process” (currently under review by a peer-reviewed physics research journal) to the online community in the hope that others, will read, think about it and offer feedback.  If the proposed model is correct, it greatly simplifies the math and provides a different perspective on the holographic principle.

The holographic approach (proposed by David Bohm) was applied to the thermodynamics of black holes by Leonard Suskind (see The World as a Hologram) and is a fairly new application to understanding quantum field theory (see Nassim Haramein’s “Quantum Gravity and the Holographic Mass” for example), but it is also applicable to many other branches of science, such as neuroscience (see Karl Pribram’s Holonomic Brain Theory), biology, information theory and the study of consciousness, as well as art and philosophy.  So it is well suited for interdisciplinary collaborative efforts.

My approach to understanding and proving the holographic nature of physical reality uses a simple geometric, relational model that I developed (and am still developing) by reverse-engineering the problem. By that I mean I started with the assumption that every quantum particle is a holographic projection, a “photon sphere” or “orb” of energy if you will, and graphically analyzed it by separating energy into two essentially equivalent yet perceptively different quantifiable components (space and time). The concept is simple. Motion is the common experience, the conserved quantity, and

the space-time-motion diagram models the difference in perspectives that everyone experiences when they realize that an object, perceived to be at rest, is also in motion relative to some other moving reference frame. Both perspectives exist simultaneously and the only difference is not in their essence, but in our perspective.

The model, I call it the space-time-motion (STM) model, only requires an understanding of undergraduate-level algebra, a little geometry, basic calculus, vectors and phasors, a little imagination and a willingness to work with natural units (as does QFT).  The key to the STM model is that it treats space and time as two different aspects of the same thing – motion. It illustrates that motion, a form of energy, presents in our perception as two equivalent yet different forms, as

1) a unit of energy referenced to its own rest frame, i.e. motion in space, that gives rise to angular momentum, and
2) as motion in time, i.e. a unit of energy referenced to some other motion – the standard unit of motion (the one used to define the standard clock).

Each of these forms is then separated into two perspectives:
1) from the inside looking out (mathematically represented as an expanding spherical wave) and
2) from the outside looking in (mathematically represented as an Euler exponential and thus a quantum wave function).

That’s four different perspectives that can all be represented in a single relational energy diagram (the representation of motion as the relationship between space and time). As a physical object, you can envision your body from all four perspectives. But you can only “see” three of them fully with your eyes. From the outside looking in, you can see the reflection of energy as your physical body. But you experience your “inner space”; you have “insight”.

The STM model treats one perspective, (from the inside-looking-out) as a vector in the linear (differentiated, relativistic) domain. It is a conformal projection – projected outward in space and time from its own center. The other perspective, (outside-looking-in) is treated as a phase vector (called a phasor, which is a simple spinor field) using a polar coordinate system in the frequency (integrated, quantum) domain. It is considered a reflection in the sense that it is the inverse of the projection and the zero-motion “event reference” point. The difference between the vector and the phasor is shown to be a magnification (characteristic of conformal projections) equal to the Lorentz factor. The reflection, represented by the circumference of a circle in the space-time plane, is the same energy as the projection and therefore a coherent wave, but scaled by a factor of 2pi (which is the linear measurement of a unit circle’s circumference, and Planck’s constant in natural units). So the functions that represent the two perspectives present as wave functions slightly shifted in phase. This is what creates the holographic effect; they appear to be different when in reality, they are the same.

To us, perception is reality, so when we perceive an object in motion relative to its background, we see it as a physical change in position and experience it as a metaphysical change in time. Without the background reference plane, we don’t see the physical change in position, yet we know that motion is ubiquitous so we believe that time is passing. In essence, we translate the concept of motion into a unit we call time. This is why many people say that time is an illusion. It’s not an illusion, it’s motion in disguise. (See The Nature of Time)

The STM model allows us to see this relationship from a “higher perspective.” By treating displacement in time exactly the same as displacement in space, it is clear that separation in perspectives creates the apparent rotation of the energy that we perceive as a particle (represented by a polar coordinate system). This rotation immediately changes the relationship between space and time (the ratio that is graphically shown as the slope of the phasor) until it is equal to the slope of the vector (which is what we measure as linear velocity, i.e. the ratio of displacement to time).  The point at which these two ratios are equal is shown to be equal to the golden ratio. The event is a reintegration of the projection with the phase-shifted reflection, very similar to the process of holographic imaging, and is shown to produce a physical energy fringe (related to the fine structure coupling constant) in space. Considering this fringe as a “germ” of energy that serves as both the holographic source and a single quantum grating of the holographic fringe, physical matter can be understood in terms of a transformational, metamorphic process that transforms formless energy (perhaps dark energy) into quantum particles with mass and angular momentum.

I begin with the same model as the Minkowski space-time diagram, which separates (mathematically differentiates) motion into orthogonal dimensions of space and time. By graphically superimposing a polar coordinate system (frequency domain) over the linear (relativistic) domain, the result is the STM energy diagram that models the linear domain as a vector projection in space and time (with magnitude equal to the total energy Hamiltonian including the Lorentz magnification) and the frequency domain as a phasor with magnitude equal to the energy, E=hf, of a quantum particle (since frequency, f, is the inverse of time).

Several relevant equations have been “derived” from or illustrated by the STM model, including the ones mentioned above as well as, De Broglie and Compton wavelengths, the Schrodinger equation and the Klein-Gordon equation. In order to advance this model, several experts will be needed, especially physicists, mathematicians and engineers who understand the physics of holography, relativity and quantum mechanics, Quantum Field Theory – the equations associated with the standard model of particle physics, and the current theory of gravity (including Einstein’s field equations).

Some computer programming will also be very helpful to produce graphical “windows” representation of the two domains and illustrate how focusing on the relativistic domain has the effect of collapsing the quantum domain. For future applications of the model, experts in biological processes and information theory will be needed because the process of DNA and cell reproduction appear to be amplifications of the process (differentiation, projection, reflection, reintegration), and DNA molecules contain information that may also be explained as information entropy stored by the holomorphic process. One of the long-term, practical engineering goals of this research is to understand radioactive isotopes as holographic units that can be “tuned” and thereby transformed to their stable state, with applications to radioactive waste processing. This will require experts in nuclear and radiological physics and engineering.

As a medical physicist I can see the value in the holographic approach to medical imaging. But a better understanding of the holographic nature of matter can also lead to improved treatment techniques. My doctorate thesis was on the development of a geometrically-based method of stereotactic radiosurgery to treat brain tumors, and I can envision the use of holographic tuning to modulate the radiation beams in a way that will deposit radiation dose to tumor tissue more selectively than the current procedure, which uses a single-frequency, collimated beam that is rotated about an isocenter to build up dose to the tumor while spreading it out in healthy tissue.